Linux Humor LG #46

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A co-worker brought to my attention this little link: Coy: Like Carp, Only Prettier. It’s a Perl module described by its author, Damian Conway, thusly:

When a program dies 
what you need is a moment 
of serenity. 

module brings tranquillity 
to your debugging. 

The module alters 
the behaviour of die and 
warn (and croak and carp).

Coy reports errors from the 
caller's point-of-view. 

But it prefaces 
the bad news of failure with 
a soothing haiku. 

Not a bad idea.

Wait, it gets better. The description of the haiku generator algorithm is itself written in haiku.

The paper cites a Salon Magazine contest for haiku error messages. These are my favorite entries, although all of them are worth a read:

A file that big?
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.
        -- David J. Liszewski 

Printer not ready.
Could be a fatal error.
Have a pen handy?
        -- Pat Davis 

The Web site you seek
cannot be located but
endless others exist
        -- Joy Rothke

Windows NT crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.
        -- Peter Rothman 

All this got me thinking: does anybody have any Linux poetry they’d like to share? Not necessarily haiku–any kind of poetry. There are lots of geeky UNIX things floating about, but nothing specifically Linux-related. (Or is my memory getting dim?) Maybe someday I’ll try writing a Linux sonnet.

P.S. Another co-worker sent me a link to a Star Wars move done in ASCII animation (asciimation). It requires Java.

Copyright © 1999, Mike Orr
Published in Issue 46 of Linux Gazette, October 1999

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